Thursday, June 4, 2015

Haibun: Still--By Angelee Deodhar--India

Haibun: Still

Elsa, our cocker spaniel, the color of sunshine poured out the bottle, a scintillating shade of gold unmatched on any palette is dying. A breast lump removed a few months ago has extended its tentacles into her spine and her hip. Eleven years old [77yrs in human years] she can barely walk out the door or get up to have a drink of water, her appetite gone she is virtually starving and not accepting the food that we try to put in her mouth.

Checking over the place where our vet buried his dogs, I look at our small patch of mud which would not hold her. She looks at me with limpid eyes knowing her time has come. What she doesn’t know that I will play Kevorkian when the time comes. How will I know when to let her go?

    our walk slows
    as she sniffs fallen blossoms
    - approaching storm


Previously published in Albatross Autumn, Winter 2008

Angelee Deodhar, an eye surgeon by profession is a haiku poet, translator, and artist. She lives and works in Chandigarh, India. Her haiku/haibun/haiga have been published internationally in various books and journals, and her work can be viewed on many websites. To promote haiku in India, she has translated six books of haiku from English to Hindi, which she distributed for free. These bilingual books include: If Someone Asks: Masaoka Shiki's Life and Haiku (2005),Classic Haiku: A Master's Selection, edited by Miura Yuzuru (2006), Ogura Hyakunin Isshu: 100 Poems by 100 Poets (2007), Children’s Haiku from Around the World–A Haiku Primer (2007), Indian Haiku (2008), and The Distant Mountain: The Life and Haiku of Kobayashi Issa (2009).

18 comments:

  1. a sad reminder of all the times we have to farewell loved pets, but your lovely description of Elsa will live on for her... I will be looking out for you, as I would love to read more of your work.

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  2. thank you dear Maureen for your kind words and dear Karen for publishing this haibun
    love and light
    angelee

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  3. This is a marvelous poem. You have a striking poetic sense about you, I enjoy that. Thank you for letting us read this heart wrenching piece.

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  4. A wonderful tribute to your dog.

    warmest regards,

    Alan

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  5. moving piece, thanks for sharing.

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  6. A sad tail indeed though I was most intrigued by your Haibun as it is a style I am trying to perfect with Vivienne Lorraine Harding and Richard W Jenkins my tutors on Poetry and Short Story Ink I have never seen it done like this though I thought it was a poem inserted into another poem, you learn something new every day!

    Thanks for sharing your poem with us and giving me this rich lesson it is much appreciated!

    As a dog lover I can empathise with you I the story about your dog

    Deepest Sympathies

    George

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    1. Dear George,

      Intriguing a poem inside a poem.

      There are haibun, such as mine, that utilise prose poems followed by a haiku, or free verse poetry followed by a haiku.

      I regularly teach haibun, and tanka stories.

      Here's another type of haibun:
      http://area17.blogspot.co.uk/2014/03/rooster-moans-and-land-of-rising-haibun.html

      warm regards,

      Alan, With Words

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    2. Thanks Alan for you pointers I will take a look!

      George

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    3. As With Words I run professional classes in the various haikai genres, with the next one in the Fall.

      By the way, have you purchased this fantastic book of haibun?

      Journeys:
      http://pothi.com/pothi/book/angelee-deodhar-journeys

      The HSA review:
      http://www.hsa-haiku.org/frogpond/2015-issue38-1/Deodhar-ReviewedByBuettner-Fp38-1.pdf

      Enjoy!

      warm regards,

      Alan, With Words
      http://area17.blogspot.com
      www.withwords.org.uk

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    4. No Alan but I will look it up!

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    5. Angelee Deodhar has been at the forefront of creating haibun anthologies, with a second one coming out soon.

      Most of my haibun are in print, so not easily found, or and one was a commission for the Bristol Old Vic theatre which is twenty minutes long.

      Thankfully Angelee has anthologised a number of my works in the forthcoming second haibun anthology. :-)

      warm regards,

      Alan

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  7. I found this poem very heartfelt. Loved it. I have a 15 year old dog I've had since she was 5 weeks old and know the time for her is short. Thank you for putting your heart on paper.

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  8. Thank you,to all of you esp you Alan ,for your kind support,love and light
    angelee

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  9. This well written wonderful tribute to your beloved pet, brought a tear to my eye as I thought of my own little dog that was so sick last week that I was afraid I too would have to once again play Kevorkian, like I had to with my dear departed mother's little dog when it was her time. Although I feel it is wrong to do mercy killings for humans, I completely understand the distress of watching another human being as well as an animal suffer and want it all just to end for them. Thank you for sharing this poem.
    Charlene.

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  10. What a poignant poem, Angelee. It is still fresh.

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  11. Angelee,
    God bless you for being able to give your books out for free! Wish I could do that! Getting to your haibun, I know the pain of losing a pet! Thank you for adding graphics to "Summer Memories" and "Creating"!
    Your friend,
    David Fox

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  12. When her pain is too great for both of you to bear...We lost our cocker Teddy in this way and it broke our hearts, but his crying no longer haunts us and the happy memories of him remain. Your poem is heartfelt and beautiful...Blessings, Connie

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  13. I wanted to mention that I read your poem Raindance and I loved it so much I had to make a copy of it. Your talent is phenomenal! Aloha, Connie

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